Francesca and Jeff's Wedding 20 Years Ago!

Today, April 30, 2020, I opened my email to find this heart-warming message: 

Dear Kayelily:

First of all, I hope that you and yours are doing well during this dreadful pandemic outbreak and that you are both safe and healthy. I am reaching out to you because yesterday, April 29, 2020, my husband, Jeff Eischen, and I celebrated our 20^thwedding anniversary. Yes, twenty years ago, you officiated our wedding! This was the beginning of quite a journey for our blended family (both Jeff and I had 7 year old boys), filled with a great many highs and some inevitable lows. However, I am happy to report that  we have transcended the test of time so far and have felt deeply grateful for one another and the life we have built. Our boys are now nearly 28 years old and consider themselves brothers. Greg, my son, is a medical resident at Duke hospital, and Christopher, Jeff’s son, is a senior financial consultant with Deloitte in Charlotte. I have attached three photos of our beautiful wedding ceremony in Cary, NC. Also, below I am attaching the social media post that I circulated yesterday:

Many thought that we should never have married. Yet we still plunged into the madness of a two career blended family with overwhelming naïveté. The struggles and trials of the first four years nearly made us walk away, but we persisted and gradually we got better. Then, in the blink of an eye, 20 years have passed —our two successful boys are all grown up (and still come home for a home cooked meal and a hug now and then), we look ahead to winding down careers, and grapple with the sorrow of aging parents. Undeterred, however, we continue to seek and find new adventures and future challenges together, proving that indeed the true joy in marriage lies in the journey, not the destination. Happy 20th anniversary to *us* Jeff Eischen—full steam ahead 💕

 — with Jeff Eischen.

I wanted to share this with you as a heartfelt  thank you for being there at the start and for blessing our marriage and our fledgling family that at some level was woefully unprepared for what was to come. I believe that you made a  big difference in our success.

With much appreciation and warm regards,

Francesca Florey Eischen (and family)

It is moments like this that make my work with couples so rewarding and why I keep on going. I remember Francesca and Jeff's wedding vividly. It was at a private home tucked back in the woods in Cary with a steep incline in the driveway. Marty and I arrived just behind the truck delivering their wedding cake and we held our breaths watching to see if the cake was going to slide off the truck! Wonder of wonders, it arrived intact. 

Francesca and Jeff wanted to honor their two boys in the ceremony and this was my first time including a blessing for the children of a blended family in the ceremony. We put together these words and I am still using this blessing as an example for couples 20 years later:

"As part of the family nature of marriage, we recognize Gregory and Christopher and the very important role that they play in this relationship celebrated today.  

Christopher and Gregory, Francesca and Jeff want you to know that you are very much part of their relationship and loved and appreciated for your own unique selves. Their marriage will enrich your lives because your interests will always be considered and your needs honored. As a token of their promise to you they have brought special medallions to give to you today to represent their commitment to you. Treasure your medallion as a symbol that you are included in their thoughts and prayers always."

And now those boys are young men finding their way in the world having had effective parenting from their parent and stepparent. 

Francesca and Jeff--thank you for remembering me and giving me the honor of joining you in marriage and this tribute 20 years later! You have done all the hard work in the past 20 years making your relationship work and being role models for Christopher and Gregory. Congratulations! Sending love and many many blessings for another 20 plus years together!

Rebecca and Andy's Wonderful Wedding at the Brick & Mortar!

This was my first wedding at Brick & Mortar Events in downtown Clayton. It was an amazing place too. The downstairs is open space then there is a loft that wraps around 3 sides of the room.

Rebecca and Andy chose December 8, 2019 for their wedding date and invited a lot of guests. When I arrived the table with the Family Unity Sand Ceremony was set up in front of a drape with Christmas decorations. The cake table was also up front. 

"Together we make a Family" is on the shadowbox container that the couple and their children will pour the sand into during the ceremony. 

When I arrive for a wedding, the first thing I do is work with the DJ to get the sound just right for the ceremony. The couple and I have worked hard to create a wonderful heartwarming ceremony and it is important that everyone can hear. Our DJ was Harvey of DJHarvNation ENT. We were having some issue with the transmitter but we got it to work.

This lovely cake was baked by I Do Cakes NC. 

This is the view of the room from the front door. Directly ahead is the bar. The DJ was to the left. 

I went up to the loft to find my first witness to sign the marriage license. 

The tables were all set for the reception and during the ceremony the overflow crowd went up on the loft.

Everything is ready for the guests! 

The chairs downstairs started filling in. 

Pam Morgan was our Wedding Director and she kept things organized and flowing on time. 

I entered when it was time to begin and made the unplugged announcement requesting guests to put away their cell phones and cameras and truly be present with Rebecca and Andy. Aimee Sue, our professional photographer, is up front with me ready to capture the processional.

The grandmothers were escorted in first, then the parents. 

The bridesmaids were next. One by one. 

Morgan our maid of honor was the last before the bride. 

I invited the guests to stand for the bride. 

Rebecca was escorted in by her grandfather, Frank! 

He transferred Rebecca's hand into Andy's hand then the guests were seated as the couple turned and faced each other.

Morgan straightens Rebecca's train as I welcomed everyone followed by an opening prayer. 

Rebecca's children, Madison and Hayden, came forward for the Children's Blessing. Andy reads from my book to them--words telling them how much he loves their mother and them and that he is so happy they become one big family this day. (In this picture you can see the pretty bouquets made by Flowers by the Neuse.) 

After the children's blessing, I had the pleasure of telling the story of Rebecca and Andy. I usually say how destiny causes their paths to cross. Well, Rebecca and Andy's paths crossed twice because the first time the timing was apparently not right. The second time 10 years later, appreciating their good fortune, they were determined to make it work and they were very successful. A very good match for each other.

At this point they each got to hear what the other had told me they love about each other. So sweet. 

They make their vows to each other. 

Then they exchanged rings. 

Now for the pouring of the sand. Rebecca and Andy pour in half of each of theirs. 

Then Madison and Hayden took turns pouring in all of theirs. 

Rebecca and Andy blended the rest of their sand together as they poured it in. 

A closing blessing for our couple.

Then the big moment of the pronouncement of marriage. I invited them to celebrate with a kiss!

Their first kiss as husband and wife! 

Wow! We are married! I signaled Morgan to hand the bouquet to Rebecca then I introduced them to their happy guests!

Rebecca and Andy! Congratulations! It was a fabulous wedding and I loved joining you in marriage and working with you to create your amazing ceremony. I wish you all the best!!

Brooke and Justin's Wonderful Wedding at Highgrove!

The wedding day of December 7th 2019 was sparkling and clear. A little chilly but not bad for December! Happy to be back at Highgrove for another great wedding! 

(The photos on this post were taken by my good friend Bob Andron who graciously volunteered to come with me because Dave was off at another gathering. The photos are taken with his iPhone 8+. Thanks so much, Bob! Great job!)

The stunning pergola is ready for the ceremony. Flowers on Broad does such a beautiful job!

Pretty hanging lanterns with candles inside flanked the table with the sand ceremony components. 

That chandelier is so elegant! 

This is the covered terrace area with bar where the guests congregate after the ceremony before the reception. 

The Garden Ballroom is decked out and ready. Big dance floor!

The sweetheart table for Brooke and Justin is in front of the fireplace. 

Nearby is the lovely cake by the Highgrove bakery. 

Ready for the ceremony are Nina and her assistant with All Events DJ. I work with them a lot! 

A fairly new addition to the Highgrove estate is this outdoor fireplace. 

It has a clear fiberglass room which protects it from rain and small ceremonies can be here. 

Checking in with Justin before the ceremony. 

Before the ceremony began, our Highgrove director Virginia cued the father of the flower girls to move into position at the bottom of the steps. We learned at the rehearsal that the little girls did not do well descending steps so best to start them on the ground level.

Then I entered to make the Unplugged Announcement before the processional began. 

Justin's grandmother was escorted in. Then Justin escorted his mother, Leeanne, in and joined me up front. (not pictured)

The flower girls are waiting patiently! 

Mother of the bride, Wendy, was escorted in by father of the bride, Don, who circled back for the bride. 

Justin's dad, Wade, was one of his groomsmen and escorted in one of the bridesmaids. 

Sweet ring bearer did his job perfectly! 

And now it's time for the flower girls to make their way down the aisle. The younger one needed some extra encouragement and help from her dad but they made it. Children in the ceremony are often easily intimidated by the guests watching them and may or may not make it down the aisle. This is something that cannot be anticipated at the rehearsal because no guests are there.

The flower petals are sprinkled and the little girls get to their chairs while the music changes for the entrance of the bride.

Brooke and her sweet daddy make their entrance while the guests stand in their honor! 

After Brooke was presented, the guests took their seats, and the couple turned and faced each other. I welcomed everyone, and said a prayer.

Then I stepped out and spoke to the couple's parents in a surprise blessing and tribute to them. 

It was then that we also paid tribute to their son, Jackson, who was born in April of 2019. 

Then it was my pleasure to share with the guests the story of how Justine and Brooke met and their journey to this wonderful wedding day.

They have a good story and we had some fun laughing at some of the funny moments. 

Then they get to hear what the other told me that they love about each other. 

Time for the vows! They each said "I do" and I called for the rings. 

They exchanged the rings as they said the words to each other after me. 

They pour their containers together and add some for Jackson representing family unity. 

A closing blessing. 

The pronouncement of marriage. 

Their first married kiss! 

Yay! Finally married and so happy!

Stepping out into the next chapter of their lives together!

Brooke gives the camera a big smile and Justin is just glad that the ceremony is done and it is time to celebrate! 

Our ring bearer escorts out mother of the groom, Leanne. 

I invited the guests to go up to the terrace and enjoy cocktails before the reception.

I had asked the grandparents to stay in their seats because the wedding party was coming back to take photos. They told me how much they enjoyed the ceremony. Always happy to hear that. 

Justin and Brooke! It was a wonderful wedding you planned and it went so well. I am so happy for you and wish you all the best!