Why hire a professional wedding officiant?

 There are several reasons why hiring a professional officiant for your wedding ceremony is a good idea:

1. Experience: A professional wedding officiant has experience in conducting wedding ceremonies and knows how to ensure that the ceremony runs smoothly. They will be able to guide you through the process and make sure that everything is in place for your special day.

2. Personalization: A professional wedding officiant will work with you to create a personalized ceremony that reflects your beliefs, values, and preferences. They will take the time to get to know you and your partner to create a ceremony that is unique to you.

3. Legal requirements: A professional wedding officiant knows the legal requirements for a wedding ceremony in the state where you are marrying. They will ensure that all the necessary paperwork is completed correctly and submitted on time.

4. Professionalism: A professional wedding officiant will be reliable, punctual, and professional in their approach. They will be dressed appropriately and will conduct themselves with dignity and respect.

5. Peace of mind: Hiring a professional wedding officiant will give you peace of mind, knowing that your ceremony is in good hands. You can relax and enjoy your special day, knowing that everything is taken care of.

Hiring a professional officiant can help ensure that your wedding ceremony is a memorable and meaningful experience for couples and their guests.

ARE YOU LEGALLY MARRIED, PART TWO 2022

 A new court case in NC illustrates once again that NC does not recognize on line ordained ministers as legitimate officiants for weddings in NC. 

https://www.rhinotimes.com/ask-carolyn/ask-carolyn-dec-5-2022/

Ask Carolyn: Dec. 5, 2022

Carolyn J. Woodruff

Dear Carolyn:

As the holiday season approaches, one of my friends wants me to officiate at their wedding. The friend says this is done all the time. What do you think? Can I be the person to give the vows at my friend’s wedding?

Carolyn Answers:

This “my friend, my wedding officiant” is becoming a popular question and practice. Approximately 43 percent of weddings use a family or friend as an officiant, up 29 percent since 2009 (The Knot). I have been asked about the legality of private wedding officiants several times recently and even had someone ask me to officiate a wedding. My response was, “no.” North Carolina has precise requirements for who can perform a wedding; among those persons are ordained ministers and magistrates.

Hill v. Hill is a 2022 case from the North Carolina Court of Appeals. Linda and Carlyle married in a backyard wedding with an officiant named Moonhawk. Moonhawk had a mail-order reverend certificate from Universal Life Church. She also said she was a Reiki master.  Carlyle filed to annul the marriage after Linda filed domestic violence charges against him. The court ruled the marriage was void, and the Court of Appeals affirmed the voiding of the wedding. While the case is notable for several reasons because Mr. Hill died before all the hearings were completed, the annulment should tell us about friend and family officiants.

There are several ways to handle the fact that the people conducting your wedding are not legally recognized in NC to solemnize marriage. 

 

Option 1: Hire a legally ordained officiant to come to your wedding and make the pronouncement of marriage at the end of the ceremony and handle the signing of the marriage license. Or, that officiant could “co-officiate” your ceremony with your family member. 

 

Option 2: Hire a legally ordained officiant to do a “signing” of the license before or after your ceremony on the wedding day with the two of you and your two witnesses so that the date is the same as your ceremony. No ceremony, just the pronouncement of marriage. Or do a signing on another day prior to the wedding—but the dates would not match up. 

 

Option 3: Go to a county courthouse and get married by a magistrate (county appointed judge) there. You may have to make an appointment. Magistrates marry couples in the courtroom on weekdays during working hours. On weekends some county magistrates will officiate your wedding at a detention center/jail. You can only bring your two witnesses. $50.

Social Security Field Offices Open! Good News for Couples Changing Their Names!

To change your name after marriage, you will need to request and pay for a few Certificates of Marriage from the county Register of Deeds that issued your marriage license. They are $10 each. Some counties allow ordering online but others you must request by mail or go in person. I recommend you get 3 or 4. 

 

To change your name on legal documents, you must start first with the Social Security name change and get a replacement card with your new name on it. DMV and SSA share the same name system so once you have changed your name at SSA, you can go to DMV and get a new license with your new name on it. For Passport you can go ahead and get started on that as soon as you get your marriage certificate. Any changes on licenses that are required for your work, go ahead and send a Certificate of Marriage to the licensing board. 

 

The good news as of June 2022, the Social Security field offices are open again. So you can walk your marriage certificate in in-person and get your name changed that day without going through the download and mail in process that was in effect during COVID. They will not keep the certificate of marriage but need to see it then hand it back to you. (Of course, you can still do the online process if you prefer. *See instructions below.) SSA hours are 9 to 4 weekdays. There are 2 lines and you should get in the one without an appointment. (The guard in Wake County told me that a rep will come get those of you there to change your name on your card so you don’t have to wait so long and if you get there by 3:30, you will be out of there by 4:00.) The Raleigh Social Security office has recently moved from Old Wake Forest Road to 3315 Poole Road. 

 

To change your name on your passport follow these guidelines: https://www.us-passport-service-guide.com/passport-name-change.html You will send in an original Certificate of Marriage with your application, new photo if required, current passport, check for fee. It takes 6 to 8 weeks unless you pay to expedite it. 

 

Once you have started the name change process, you must follow through because if you travel by plane or cruise, all your ID must match. If you are going on a honeymoon right after your wedding, make sure all reservations are in your maiden/current name because you will not have time to complete the name change process until after you return home. 

 

Still an option: 

*Changing your name Online/and mail in instructions for Social Security: 

1.     Download form SS-5 from SSA.gov website. https://www.ssa.gov/forms/ss-5.pdf

2.     Fill it out. Item 1, line 1 should be the new name you want to be on your new SS card. Line 2 shows your former/maiden name, line 3 for any other names you have used. 

3.     Not necessary to fill out Items 9 and 10, the information about your mother and father. 

4.     Don’t forget to sign it! (Make a photocopy for your records)

5.     Supporting documents: It would be a good idea to photocopy your driver’s license or birth certificate as an additional identifying document but not absolutely necessary since the marriage certificate has a lot of information on it and has always been sufficient in the past. Mail the completed SS-5, an original Certificate of Marriage (photocopy not acceptable), any other ID you are submitting, in Wake County mail to: 3315 Poole Road, Raleigh NC 27610.

6.     It may take anywhere between 2 and 4 weeks to get your new card. They will return your original Certificate of Marriage

7.     When you get your new SS card, you can go to DMV and change your name on your driver’s license. Take an original Certificate of Marriage with you. They are paperless and won’t keep it but they have to see it. 

 

Here is a link to the SSA blog that explains the process: https://blog.ssa.gov/need-to-change-your-name-on-your-social-security-card/

NAME CHANGE PROCESS CHANGES DUE TO COVID

All Social Security offices are now closed and services are being handled online and by mail. Below is a summary of the new process to change your name after marriage. If both spouses wish to change their names, they must each follow this process individually. Hyphenating last names requires that you go through this process. 

 

To change your name after marriage, you will need to get a few Certificates of Marriage from the County Register of Deeds that issued your marriage license. They are $10 each. Some counties allow ordering online but others you must request by mail or go in person. I recommend you get 3 or 4. 

 

To change your name on legal documents, you must start first with the Social Security name change and get a replacement card with your new name on it. Only after you have received your new card can you then go to DMV and get your name changed on your license because DMV and SSA share the same name system. For Passport you can go ahead and get started on that after mailing your application to SS. Any changes on licenses that are required for your work, go ahead and send a Certificate of Marriage to the licensing board. 

 

Until further notice, all the Social Security offices are closed and all the name changes are done by mail. Here is the procedure to change your name on SS card:

1.     Download form SS-5 from SSA.gov website. https://www.ssa.gov/forms/ss-5.pdf

2.     Fill it out. Item 1, line 1 should be the new name you want to be on your new SS card. Line 2 shows your former/maiden name, line 3 for any other names you have used. 

3.     Not necessary to fill out Items 9 and 10, the information about your mother and father. 

4.     Don’t forget to sign it! (Make a photocopy for your records)

5.     Supporting documents: It would be a good idea to photocopy your driver’s license or birth certificate as an additional identifying document but not absolutely necessary since the marriage certificate has a lot of information on it and has always been sufficient in the past. 

6.     Mail the completed SS-5, an original Certificate of Marriage (photocopy not acceptable), any other ID you are submitting, in Wake County mail to: 4701 Old Wake Forest Road, Raleigh NC 27609.

7.     It may take anywhere between 2 and 4 weeks to get your new card. They will return your original Certificate of Marriage

8.     When you get your new SS card, you can go to DMV and change your name on your driver’s license. Take an original Certificate of Marriage with you. They are paperless and won’t keep it but they have to see it.

 

To change your name on your passport follow these guidelines: https://www.us-passport-service-guide.com/passport-name-change.html You will send in an original Certificate of Marriage with your application, new photo if required, current passport, check for fee. It takes 6 to 8 weeks unless you pay to expedite it. 

 

Once you have started the name change process, you must follow through because if you travel by plane or cruise, all your ID must match. If you are going on a honeymoon right after your wedding, make sure all reservations are in your maiden/current name because you will not have time to start the name change process until after you return home. 

 

Brooke and Jake's Leap Year Wedding at The Bridge Club!

Brooke and Jake are such a fun-loving couple and they made sure their wedding reflected that. I loved working with them to make their ceremony a reflection of their personalities, their beliefs, love and commitment. Their wedding date was February 29, 2020, that rare leap year date that only comes around every 4 years. They chose the Bridge Club in downtown Raleigh for their venue.

When I arrived I went upstairs to find the bride and groom, parents and wedding party. 

The long tables were all set and ready for the reception to follow cocktail hour. 

Little framed notations about locations and events in their journey together were placed along the place settings. 

Back downstairs to the ceremony and cocktail hour area to get my witnesses to sign the marriage license and do a sound check with the DJ--Mike Steffan with High Impact Entertainment--before the guests were seated. This is a photo of the quiz and advice cards for the entertainment of the guests and feedback to the couple. Fun!

Our photographer--Kelley Deal, Kelley Deal Photography--was busy getting her settings right and scoping the area for good angles. Thanks to Kelley for sharing her photos with me which are designated in this blog. Other photos were taken with my iPhone 8+ by my sweet husband, Dave.

The "altar" area was a copper arbor by the couple who did their own florals. 

When the guests were all seated, the time was right and the wedding party and parents lined up, I entered first and made the unplugged announcement asking the guests to put away their phones and cameras. Then the processional of the parents and wedding party began.

When everyone but the bride was in place, I invited the guests to stand in honor of the bride. 

The bride and her father made their way down the aisle. 

Brooke's father answered my question and placed her hand in Jake's and everyone was seated. 

The ceremony opened with a warm welcome to everyone who had come from near and far for this wedding. 

(Photo courtesy of Kelly Deal)

Next came an opening prayer. 

Then I stepped out to address their parents in a surprise tribute to their love and support of our couple. 

Then the really fun part of the ceremony was telling the story of how Brooke and Jake met and their journey to their wedding day. (Photo courtesy of Kelley Deal)

They each answered questionnaires for me so the story reflected both points of view of what attracted them to each other and how they felt.

Brooke and Jake supplied me with great information to work with to create a very amusing story! 

There was lots and lots of laughter during the story and especially about the proposal that Jake planned and how it played out. (Photo courtesy of Kelley Deal)

Then Brooke got to hear what Jake told me he loves about her and what he is looking forward to in marriage. Then Jake got to hear what Brooke told me about her love for him. 

Jake was having so much fun, he was sweating. I took my hankie and reached up to wipe his forehead.

At this point I said "Getting married is hard work, isn't it, Jake?" Laughter! 

Then it was time for them to exchange their vows and rings. We included the Celtic tradition of handfasting as I bound their hands together with a handfasting cord. 

After wrapping the cord around their hands, a blessing of their hands followed.

They read their vows to each other from my book while their hands were bound.

Brooke says her vows to Jake.

I removed the cord which was symbolically replaced by their rings. 

A closing blessing then I pronounced them married and invited them to share their first kiss as husband and wife.

Finally happily married! 

The "after-kiss" moment when the reality sinks in that they are married!

The maid of honor handed the bride her bouquet and I presented the newlyweds to their guests!

And out they go into the next chapter of their lives together--marriage! 

(Photo courtesy of Kelley Deal)

(Photo courtesy of Kelley Deal) 

Brooke and Jake! What a great wedding! I loved working with you two and your wonderful sense of humor. You are so great together and I am honored you chose me to join you in marriage. Blessings to you now and always! I also thank you for the wonderful review you gave me on Weddingwire:

Cecil Jake Saunders , married on 02/29/2020 

 5.0 

If you are having anxiety over how to pick an officiant, know that you can't go wrong with this choice. 

Reverend Kayelily Middleton was the officiant for our leap day 2020 wedding, and we could not recommend her more highly. She listened to all of our concerns and then helped us design a customized ceremony for our wedding that shared our story with our loved ones. We have gotten so many compliments about the ceremony, including how entertaining Kayelily was, and how she must be an old family friend because it seemed like she’s known us for years. She is amazing at her job, probably because she has married thousands of couples! She guided us through the logistics of getting the marriage license, knew exactly what to do in the rehearsal, and will help design a ceremony just for you.